7 Beliefs Observed During the Wake (Lamay) and Interment (Libing) of My Lolo

January 06, 2018

Filipinos have colorful and different cultures and beliefs. These are observable from our daily lives up to special occasions. Even wake (lamay in Filipino term) and burial (libing) of our dead loved ones are showing Filipinos' beliefs. During the death of my Lolo Berting, I have seen how people acted when they visit the house of my grandparents to sympathize over our family's loss. The following are some of the beliefs:


  1. Do not wear anything red. If you are planning to don with your favorite red apparel, you better change your mind. The family as well as the visitors might have eye brows rise on you. Red is a vibrant color; it does not match the gloomy atmosphere of the place. When my brother, who was wearing his red t-shirt, entered the house, my mother immediately told him to change his clothes. Aside from the color mentioned above, do not wear any vibrant color. Better wear black or white clothes to show respect to the bereaved family.
  2. Leave the uneaten foods and drinks in the place. If the family offered you foods and drinks and you do not like to eat nor drink, you should not bring any going to your home. Bringing food from wake may bring bad omen including death to your family. You better eat some or better refuse from the start. 
  3. Allow the visitors to leave without assistance. Some of our visitors refused to assist them going to the roads when they are bound homeward. They said to us that the spirit of the dead might join them in their leaving. Whoever wants to have a ghostly travel buddy anyway?
  4. Have someone to view and guard the remains. It is inappropriate if all the households will fall asleep. There should be someone to watch over the the remains. They say that if no one is guarding the corpse, it might leave the coffin. So, it is better to have a turn- taking in watching the dead.
  5. Cover the dead with a blanket. During the church funeral service of our lolo, one of our relatives talked to my lola (grandmother) softly saying that the dead body should have covered with blanket. I asked my lola why and she replied that lolo might get cold. Then, my mother and her siblings countered this step. In the cemetery, lolo's living sisters and my aunts and uncle are contrasting each other whether to open the casket or not. At the end, it was opened.  My lola used big body white towel as a replacement of the blanket.
  6. Wash the face after attending the burial. Well attending the burial is a challenging one. You need to walk to send the dead to his resting place. It makes you sweat. Then, going home a pail of water welcome you. But, this is not for you to freshen up or mesmerize. This is another belief. You should wash your face to make the spirit not follow you. 
  7. Lights on for forty days overnight. After the burial, my mother's cousin prompted me to light the house for forty nights consecutively. This is to prevent the spirit to hover the place. Well, with this, I do not know if seeing high electric bill is scarier than seeing a ghost?
It is not bad to practice these beliefs. These are already passed generation to generation. It is a must to pay respect to our elders. However, we are now on the 21st century. Culture is changing. What important is we have high respect to the dead, to the family, and to the community. Also, there should be a strong faith on God in dealing with death. 

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